On Boris Johnson as London Mayor and honest politics

Ten years ago this November, Jesse “The Body” Ventura left his best speedos to his ring mate Hulk Hogan and became Minnesota’s 38^th Governor.

Before turning to politics, Mr Ventura the wrestler, turned into acting with mixed success appearing in testosterone fuelled films like Predator, Running Man or Demolition Man.

You will see a pattern here, since exactly 5 years after Ventura, Arnold “Terminator” Schwarzenegger was sworn in also as a 38^th Governor, but this time of California, a State of the Union with a GDP in the same range as Spain and Italy.

Other than off-note remarks, Minnesota is still there after Ventura left (I wish I could say the same about post-Bush USA or post-Blair UK). And after the shambles that “professional” politicians made of California’s financials, Governator’s legacy is still to be seen, but so far so good -and against his own party’s policies more often than not.

One thing is true, though, these two men are self-made successful men and politicians, starting from zero, and climbing high up the social ladder. All my respect for them. They made it and had no incentive to steal, or make empty promises.

Fast forward a few years later. It is only the 3^rd, but the conservative Boris Johnson beat “Red” Ken Livingstone in London’s mayoral race.

As reported by the BBC, here we have some of the new Mayor’s pearls:

On his week-long career in management consultancy

Try as I might I could not look at an overhead projection of a growth-profit matrix and stay conscious

on the campaign trail in 2004

Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3

after being questioned on Have I Got News for You about drug use

I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed and so it did not go up my nose. In fact, I may have been doing icing sugar

on press reports of his relationship with Petronella Wyatt (a fellow journalist he did have an affair with)

I have not had an affair with Petronella. It is complete balderdash. It is an inverted pyramid of piffle

As I commented before, whatever the outcome of this last cheerleader of politics, we cannot say that we didn’t know the man.

If something children, drunks and Boris Johnson have in common is that they cannot lie. I cannot wait for the jack of buffoons to put his hands on London. Fresh air in politics, no more WMDs that are not there, no more missions accomplished that are not even started, no more public hearings on congestion charge extensions when the cameras are all set-up and fully paid for, the end of phony deals with South American dictators.

We better get used to sleepless nights, but that is just the lesser evil of living with children or friendly drunks. A fair price to pay.

.Calvin